The glass droped to the floor. She stood there looking at the shattered pieces, her hands shaking. This was not who was supposed to walk through her door, back into her life.
“Hey,” He said dropping a duffle bag loudly.
“You don’t get to waltz back in here, like you never left.” She fumed, pulling her eyes away from the devastation that seemed to be an apt metaphor for her life. “You don’t get to say hey.”
“Cecilia, please…” He looked down at the glass “That one was from our wedding set.”
She was furious how dare he bring up their wedding. She marched across the shattered glass to him giving him a firm push. “Leave.”
“Your ruining our carpet,” he said quietly unfazed by her aggression.
“I don’t care.” She said wincing from the glass in her feet. Feeling a little regretful about the carpet dispite herself.
“Let me take care of that,” he offered. “Give me a chance to explain.”
She locked eyes with him challenging him, sizing him up, ready to argue with him. She didn’t see any of the man who had left months ago. She hobbled over to the couch, “Fine.”
“Cecilia, I’m sorry I bolted.” He said softly as he picked the glass out of her feet. “I was so scared. I didn’t know what was happening to me.”
He took a small pile of glass to the garbage, his boots crunching over the last remains of the glass. He came back to her with a damp rag and cleaned the blood off her feet. He vaccumed the glass out of the carpet and swept it up in the kitchen. She let the silence hang there, unwilling to be the one to break it.
“I didn’t know what was wrong with my head. It scared me.” He said sitting down next to her.
“You disappeared, without a trace. That scared me.” She said, “It hurt every time I had to make an excuse why you were gone, because I didn’t know.”
He twisted his hands together, she knew he was nervous about something.
“What did you do?” She asked her tone sharp. “Or who did you do?”
“Cecilia, I…” He put his head in his hands, “I can’t tell you, but believe be it won’t happen again.”
She wanted to believe him. Before he had left he had been a wildman. He had taken down all the mirrors, would mutter to himself, and run through the house looking frantically for something. In one of his wild searches he had broken the first in the set of their wedding glass set. She had broken the other today. She eyed him suspiciously.
“Ill give you a probationary return.” She said after a long silence. She had to admit to herself she still loved him. She knew how she felt about him, how he might feel about her nagged at her.
He seemed relieved that she had at least partially forgiven him. “I’ll make up for everything.”
He touched her cheek. She remembered when they had met so many years ago. He use to touch her face all the time, until the madness had him then it was like she never existed.
“Tell me what you were looking for.” She said.
“I was looking for you. I knew you existed but I couldn’t find any proof. I knew I loved you, but you were not there. I had to get out of this place that was familar but so wrong. It was like I was in someone else’s life where they never met you. It was torture. But I’m back now.”
She was worried it might happen again. She did not know why it had happened in the first place.
“You found all the stuff of us. You found our wedding album and chucked it. You broke the other glass. You screamed when you saw my wedding dress. You nearly burned the letters you sent me from your tour of duty. I managed to save most of them. You pretended I didn’t exist or you didn’t know me. Then you stormed out one day.”
He looked thoughtful. “Huh, I guess it went both ways.”
She arched an eyebrow at him.
“I found my way back to you, that’s what matters.” He said looking at his hands. She noticed his knuckles were bruised like he had been fighting.
She nodded he was back, that’s what mattered. She hoped she would understand.